Bridesmaid etiquette: Top 7 do’s and don’ts

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Is your best friend getting married? If you have never been a bridesmaid before, there are perhaps a few tips that are good to know. Being a bridesmaid is about so much more than just choosing the right bridesmaid dress for you. This is the bride’s big day and it is important that you help her to make the most out of it.

1. Don’t Outshine the Bride

The last thing you want to do is to outshine the bride. The work starts long before the wedding day. Make sure that you talk to the bride and agree on a look for the wedding. Does she want all bridesmaids to look the same? Once you have agreed on the bridesmaids’ look, stay as close to protocol as possible. 

2. Don’t Change Your Hair Colour

If you had blonde hair when you picked your dress, stay blonde. Hair colour can look bright or dull depending on dress colours. Choose the right bridesmaid dress colour for you (with the bride’s help, of course). Online stores like Cicinia give free colour swatches to avoid mistakes. Turing up at the wedding with a new hair colour, especially if it’s extreme, such as bright pink or blue, can cause a rift between you and the bride.

3. How Much Jewellery Should You Wear? 

Don’t overdo it when it comes to jewellery. Wear a discreet necklace and avoid packing on the rings. Ask the bride if it is OK to wear a watch (not all brides like it) or even that sentimental heart locket your boyfriend gave you. If you must have a watch, tuck it inside a clutch and look at it after the ceremony.

4. What About Flowers? 

The choice of flowers for the bridesmaid’s posy is just as important as the bridesmaid’s dress. You may have a favourite flower, but if it’s not the bride’s favourite, let it go. It’s the bride’s wedding after all, and flowers are a personal choice. The bride will be happy with HER favourite flowers, even if they’re not yours. Embrace them.

5. Footwear Matters

Who should pay for the bridesmaid’s shoes? On occasion, bridesmaid are asked to contribute something towards the wedding budget. It might be their dress. It might be their shoes. If you are expected to pay for your own shoes, does that mean you can choose your own design and brand? Not necessarily. At weddings, you will find that most bridesmaids opt for the same shoes. It makes the wedding attire look more uniform and complete. Encourage the bride not to choose extreme heels for her entourage. You’ll be on your feet for a long period of time and high heels can get painful. Go for a shoe that makes your day as comfortable as possible.

6. How Long Should You Keep On Your Bridesmaid’s Dress? 

If there is an evening reception, you may be asked to keep your bridesmaid’s dress on for the duration. Choose comfortable fabric like satin or chiffon – ideal for bridesmaids’ dresses. When there is scope for change, and the bride agrees that you can change your outfit, change it for something equally formal and nice. But the focus should still be on the bride and making her the star of the day.

7. Don’t Get Drunk

Getting drunk at the wedding is not only embarrassing for you but the bride and groom too. Yes, it’s easy to get carried away when the Champagne is flowing. But getting blotto is not the done thing. By all means, enjoy yourself, but take it easy. You don’t want to be the bridesmaid that everyone remembers for the wrong reason.

In Conclusion 

Instead of thinking of yourself as just the bridesmaid, think of yourself as a guest of honour. You will probably get to keep your bridesmaid dress as a memory. When you look at that dress, you want to remember a special day that was enjoyed by all. 

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